Animal Archives - Texas Podcast Massacre

Birdemic: Some Dreams Should Die and We Are Drunk

Igor August 13, 2018 Reviews 2010s, Animal, Apocalypse, Low-Budget, Terrible

The Birdemic Shock and Terror Elevator Pitch: Yoko Ono website plugs. Some of the worst CGI on earth. A Silicon Valley dream. Implausible Victoria Secret cover girls. Join the Texas Podcast Massacre crew and our returning ornithologist Taylor as they try… continue reading »

The Birds: Don’t Escape in a Soft Top

Igor August 6, 2018 Reviews 1960s, Animal, Hitchcock, Invasion

The Birds Elevator Pitch: Very dedicated practical jokes. One of the worst parties ever. Convenient ornithologists. A LOT OF BIRD PUNS! Join the Texas Podcast Massacre crew and resident ornithologist Taylor as they fly right into an owl-out debate on bird… continue reading »

Zombeavers: Leave It To Beavers

Igor May 4, 2018 Reviews 2010s, Animal, Comedy, Invasion, Monster, Teen

Rural Indiana. Conveniently blocked roads. Fast (falling off) feet. Some ‘roided up beavers. Join the TPM crew as they bring unsuspecting victim Taylor to the secluded podcast cabin to debate the scariest zombie critter and review the dam outrageous horror/comedy… continue reading »

ThanksKilling: Very Fowl Play

Igor November 22, 2017 Reviews 2000s, Animal, Low-Budget, Slasher, Terrible

Turkey puns. Comically bad acting. Ancient curses. More turkey puns. ThanksKilling is the extremely low-budget 2009 horror film from first-time director/writer Jordan Downey. Made with only about $3500 this poorly acted, poorly written and poorly filmed movie has become something… continue reading »

Monkey Shines: Ella’s There For You

Igor August 1, 2017 Reviews 1980s, Animal, Sci-Fi

The TPM dream team monkey around in the podcast studio with a Monkey Shines inspired theme song, talk about unethical science experiments and see if this movie is secretly the start of the Planet of the Apes cinematic universe. Song… continue reading »

In the very first episode of TEXAS PODCAST MASSACRE, Mitch and Nate invite Lisa to be the first unsuspecting victim as they discuss the new Friday the 13th video game, debate who is the best alien of any franchise, and review the Alien: Covenant.

TEXAS PODCAST MASSACRE is a weekly horror movie podcast where hosts Mitch and Nate talk about what’s new in the horror world, have a weekly debate, and review one horror movie. Each week, Mitch and Nate invite a special guest who typically does not watch and/or enjoy horror films to jump in the conversation as their “unsuspecting victim”, providing reviews for both horror addicts and the horror averse!

Check out TEXAS PODCAST MASSACRE at

http://www.texaspodcastmassacre.com

Twitter – @TXPodMassacre

— 001 Alien Covenant: 2 Fassbender 2 Furious

In the inaugural episode of “Lisa’s Loft”, Lisa and Unsuspecting Victim Patricia discuss “A Quiet Place” in preparation for the TPM review of “Bird Box”

Connect with us:

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!

— 088.5 Lisa’s Loft – A Quiet Place vs. Bird Box

When trailers first aired for the Columbia Pictures film Escape Room, I was skeptical about whether the film would offer more than a gimmick-filled, cheap thrill. Regardless, the movie’s premise did offer an opportunity for a fun-filled, psychological experiment that I just couldn’t pass up: Would watching Escape Room immediately before doing an escape room enhance the escape room experience? To put this question to the test, I recruited a team of willing friends to go to an evening showing of the film followed immediately by a late-night escape room.

For a full analysis of the film, check out our podcast episode. But if you haven’t yet seen the film or listened to our take, it’s enough to note that the movie does incorporate many classic escape room style puzzles in life-or-death scenarios that heighten the tension of escaping the room beyond the normal time-crunch. One scene uses an x-ray viewer as part of a puzzle, which is a device I had used in an escape room previously, so I enjoyed the clever incorporation of details used to create the atmosphere. If nothing else, the movie did a good job of heightening your immediate sense of claustrophobia, so after watching the film no one was terribly eager to be locked in a Wild-West themed room for an hour.

You read that right. Our room’s theme was Wild-West bank heist. My goal was to find something at least a little bit creepy, and unfortunately, that was the best we could find that night. There were two mannequins in the room reminiscent of the extremely creepy mannequin receptionist in the film, but nothing particularly frightening beyond that. Any fear induced by the film was quickly forgotten in our the race to puzzle it out and beat the clock. In all honesty, the walk from the theater to the escape room was probably the scariest part of the whole night because we had to go down a couple deserted alleys and hallways.

Final Cut: I would highly recommend incorporating this into your viewing experience of the film if you are able, especially if you find a somewhat creepy and ~immersive~ escape room. While the movie wasn’t quite scary enough to impact our time in the escape room, it was at the least a memorable night out with friends.

If you give this a try, let us know in the comments or on our social platforms, we’d love to hear about your experience. And please let us know if you’ve found an actually scary escape room because we would love to check it out!
— We watched “Escape Room” then did one – this is how it turned out

The Escape Room elevator pitch: Mysterious cameras. Puzzles that are not that complicated. Two-dimensional characters. Conspiracies on conspiracies.

Join Texas Podcast Massacre as they race against the clock to debate and review 2019’s first horror film Escape Room.

Show Segments:

Debate Question (06:30): What’s the best theme for an escape room?

Movie Review (17:40): Escape Room (2019)

What Would You Do Differently? (01:07:35)

Wheel of Genres: Escape Room as a Western (01:12:25)

Final Cut (01:17:25): Movie review scores from hosts and guests

Connect with us:

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Escape Room: Dr. Toucan Sam

The Pumpkinhead elevator pitch: Children in burlap bags. The most dirt per capita in the world. Hill witches. Murder coverups.

Join Texas Podcast Massacre and winter squash enthusiast Bill as they head into the country to ride dirtbikes and review 80’s cult classic Pumpkinhead.

Show Segments:

Debate Question (03:40): How would you streamline the Pumpkinhead process?

Movie Review (13:41): Pumpkinhead (1988)

What Would You Do Differently? (59:35)

Sequel Pitch (01:06:05)

Final Cut (01:11:11): Movie review scores from hosts and guests

Connect with us:

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Pumpkinhead: Vigilante Fruit Justice

Happy 2019 from us here at Texas Podcast Massacre! Ring in the New Year with the hosts to go over their favorite films from 2018 and reveal the fan vote for which movie is reviewed in 2019!

Show Segments:

Fan Vote: Statistics About Our Fans (09:09)

Fan Vote: Best Host (16:46)

Fan Vote: Changes to the Podcast for 2019 (19:32)

Fan Vote: Best Horror Film of 2018 (22:30)

Fan Vote: Best Episode and ‘Bad Episode’ of 2018 (28:00)

Fan Vote: Most Anticipated 2019 Horror Film (34:42)

Fan Vote: Favorite Horror TV Show of 2018 (40:05)

Fan Vote: Listener-picked episode to be reviewed in January 2019 (49:55)

Connect with us:

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Year in Review 2018 – Part 2

Are you afraid of commitment? Or have you already fallen off your resolution 3 days into 2019? Don’t let your new year’s resolution get you down – here are just a few ideas of new year’s resolutions for the horror fanatic!

1) Get in shape.

“Zombie races” are a fun and frightful way to train for the inevitable zombie apocalypse. They have normal 5ks, mud runs, and other variations that let you pick your poison. Typically, runners will wear flags that volunteer zombies will try to remove. If you make it to the finish without dying (losing all your flags) you get extra recognition. This is a favorite of Mitch and Lisa’s, who have participated in several over the years!

2) Read more books.

With the new Pet Sematary adaptation coming out in April, now is the perfect time to revisit the Stephen King classic in print, or read one of his newer releases like The Outsider which won the Goodreads Choice Award for 2018. Or check out the 2018 release from one of TPM’s favorite podcasts (besides TPM of course) Lore, Aaron Mahnke’s The World of Lore: Dreadful Places that explores real places where human horror or supernatural events have taken place.

3) Learn a new supernatural skill.

Take up photography so you can document any supernatural occurrences. Learn how to do horror makeup (this is an awesome skill to have). Like to bake? Try making some horror themed desserts like ghost cookies or a ouija board cake. The possibilities are endless!

Have another horror-related resolution in mind? Let us know your 2019 plans in the comments.

— New Year, New Horrors!

Happy Holidays from us here at Texas Podcast Massacre! What better way to ring in the New Year than As a belated Christmas gift for y’all the TPM crew got together to play some games and air some grievances. Stay tuned for Part 2 next week!

Show Segments:

Horror Trivial Pursuit (06:05)

What Would You Rate Differently 2018? (26:28)

Listener Podcast Reviews (39:01)

Lisa’s Revenge – Music Game (43:13)

Connect with us:

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Year in Review 2018 – Part 1

The Haunting of Hill House elevator pitch: A horror series with actual character development. Ghosts. More ghosts. Ladies with necks that are not straight.

Join Texas Podcast Massacre as they celebrate Christmas with a family so dysfunctional that yours might seem normal with Netflix’s fantastic series Haunting of Hill House.

Show Segments:

Debate Question (05:03): What old horror film would make a great streaming series?

Series Review (20:58): Haunting of Hill House (2018)

What Would You Do Differently? (57:43)

Second Season Pitch (01:02:34)

Final Cut (01:07:41): Movie review scores from hosts and guests

Connect with us:

Please take this survey and we’ll use the results in our 2018 End of the Year episodes!

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Haunting of Hill House: Christmas With The Crains

The Pooka elevator pitch: Christmas tree assault. This winter’s hottest child’s toy. Mascot costumes.Red eyes that will linger in your mind for days.

Join Texas Podcast Massacre as we debate which children’s toy would fit in a horror film and review the third episode of Hulu’s Into The Dark series with Christmas-themed Pooka.

Show Segments:

Debate Question (02:50): What horror villain should have a child origin story film?

Movie Review (16:34): Pooka (2018)

What Would You Do Differently? (50:15)

Sequel Pitch (55:16)

Final Cut (59:33): Movie review scores from hosts and guests

Connect with us:

Please take this survey and we’ll use the results in our 2018 End of the Year episodes!

Texas Podcast Massacre is a labor of love for us longtime horror fans. If you love horror films or are even an Unsuspecting Victim, you can connect with us at texaspodcastmassacre.com, tweet us @TXPodMassacre, like us on Facebook, email us at texaspodcastmassacre@gmail.com, see our photos on Instagram, watch our music videos on YouTube or catch our IMDB page.

Please rate and review us on all of your favorite podcast platforms like iTunes, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, Google Play, Spotify, and TuneIn Radio. If you like the show tell your friends, and if you don’t, then tell your enemies!
— Pooka: Into The Dark Mirror

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